Waking up to passionate screams of "You Bastard!" and "You're a Whore!" today as channel G4 runs a marathon of "Cheaters" got me thinking about this whole phenomenon. I mean okay reality TV is brain rot anyway but this show makes me giggle and otherwise realize that there are very few adults in the world.
1st if all anyone who hires a crew to follow and document their suspected significant others' fraudulent activities has some serious security issues. Why, in the name of all things holy, would you contact a TV show to air your dirty laundry? What kind of selfish attention mongers are these people?
They are people ruled by the ID. According to Freud those ruled by ID are children. These people have no self restraint to deal with their problems in a civilized manner. Relationships should not and do not take precedence over making ones own life operate. You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else. Therefore these people are self centered jerks who shouldn't be in relationships anyway. They obviously have a deep need for some kind of self-righteous approval over their "cheating" other.
Wait a minute. . . . Being in a relationship means giving of oneself to another over you own desires. Providing for the other person in and of itself brings you fulfillment. This is happening in NONE of the televised confrontations. Now are these relationships broken? Certainly.
These publicity harlots should really be taking a look at themselves 1st.
Now a little about how i perceive men and women. Women rule the world, any man who thinks otherwise is kidding and deluding himself. He is just a child thinking with the wrong head. Men must understand that women will get what they want/need either in our out of a relationship. If you are the lucky guy who is with a lady and you are providing for her in all ways then you have nothing to worry about. Be secure in the fact that she IS WITH YOU. If she didn't want to be or you are a douche-bag then she WON'T BE WITH YOU. This should be plain as day. Apparently it is not. The preceding is not to assume that men are blameless. I also mentioned Douche-baggery.
Men if you are so wrapped up in your ill-perceived magnificence that you believe yourself a "player." For Gossake at least be honest about it. Women if he exhibits signs of "player-ness" then don't freaking think that you will be "the one" who will change him.
This is like relationships 101. What's the first few rules that anyone who is in a happy committed relationship tells anyone else looking for such:
1) Be yourself
2) Be Honest--we're not talking about little white lies that keep everything civil we're talking about the big things---are your needs being met---if you can't differentiate then there are larger issues at hand.
3) COMMUNICATE!!
Weeping Jesus on the cross! It really is this simple. If any one of these 3 rules is broken the relationship will fail. granted sometimes it takes a while for these thing to manifest. Why? People change. However, people change only because they want to. . . not for anybody else period.
Back to "Cheaters" The cheating person is looking outside a relationship for something missing. Usually, it is a lack of communication between partners. If you communicate then you will be on the same page. Through communication the involved parties will find that they either do or don't share the same future vision. If there is a vast difference of vision then end the relationship and be done, don't worry about the rest, happy people are better people. Through Communication the involved parties can discern the intent of the other, #'s 1&3 are about deception. If either one is broken then partners are doomed to failure. Why is this so hard?
It is hard for 1 reason. Emotional baggage. Emotions are not in any way rational. Life is not rational either but it takes rationality to work. Therefore emotions cannot and should not rule life.
If you are okay, then you can help someone else who is okay work out and tackle life's problems together and be okay. Anything else is illusion.
Of course. . . the preceding notwithstanding sometimes people are just shitheads and there is no hope at all.
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