Children are without a doubt the most stressful, agonizing, and life changing job on the entire planet. It is also the most rewarding, secretly enjoyable, and terrifying. I love my children but am run ragged most days no matter how well behaved they are. However, the chance to experience the things i thought were gone forever, newly through my children's eyes is quite possibly the reason i don't choke them into unconsciousness after a particularly difficult discipline issue. I am glad every day that i am a father, but i do sometimes miss the "do as you please, come and go at will" nature of being childless. . . . until my children hug me then . . . .
well do you remember when (Jesus i sound old) we were just out of high school and we had some sort of celestial fire that lit our way. The world was our oyster and no matter how sandy and slimy it seemed we were gonna take it and make pearls whatever the cost and be damned!
Children are like that. Only not in a fiery thunderbolts from the heaven way. (although many times i think that i am paying off all the negative karma i accumulated giving my parents hell) Rather children are a soft gentle spark of the Divine wrapped in a smelly, loud, demanding blanket. It is the quiet times that i cherish the most, when we can snuggle together and watch a show one kid on each knee(this is getting more difficult they are growing like weeds). Somehow when i most need a lift my children give me a hug and some cuddles and life is okay again.
Kids are awesome, i never knew until i was a dad. Your capacity for love just grows exponentially when you have children.
Bonuses for parent hood
No fear ever of anything life throws your way. . except a constant nagging worry over your own progeny
Nothing ever grosses you out any more ever. . .I've been pissed on shit on, puked on, cleaned dog shit off hands, faces etc. you just learn to accept and deal.
You are always tired but you always seem to find some reserve of energy.
Best of all. . . . You get to be Superman. . . the way my kids look up to me like i am Zeus himself just tickles me purple!
Find a nice girl and have kids it will do you a world of good.
Rule #1 stop chasing after crazy bitches. They are fun but by no means worthy of your attention.
Rule #2 Don't look for someone, they will fall out of the sky into your lap.
Rule #3 if you insist on looking maybe try for the girl who's always been there. Jesus dude do you not watch romantic comedies, life is actually like that, but with less shitty dialogue.
Rule#4 Take care of yourself. You must be okay with yourself before you can take care of anyone else, this is especially true of parents.
Keep the faith brother,
Remember I'm pulling for ya we're all in this together.
Didn't you used to always tell me the the purpose in life was to find a mate who was less f'd up that yourself?
ReplyDeleteIt often amuses me how parents love to evangelize the glories and wonders of having children.
I like your rules though. People seem to have a lot of beef with your #2, but it has happened to me often in conjunction with your #3.